In my middle years, I have exchanged the position of the fetus for the — Joseph Heller

"Let someone else get killed!" "Suppose everyone on our side felt that way?" "Well then Id certainly be a damned fool to feel any other way, wouldnt I?"

"The promises of maniacs, like those of women, are not safely relied upon."

"Women my wifes age with broken marriages take up robustly with fellows much younger than themselves, sometimes boys, and their husbands dont like that part of it at all. (Its a means they have of really sticking it to us. The husbands can do without the money and kids. But they cant abide their wives humping a younger dick and letting everyone know.)"

"Vanity. Whats wrong with vanity? It doesnt satisfy."

"There is wisdom in madness and strong probability of truth in all accusations, for people are complete and everybody is capable of everything"

"The years are too short, the days are too long."