Spy Hard

"This is a picture of my father. If we get separated, find him. Save him."

"Heres to your remarkable powers of observation, Mr. Steele. I am agent 3.14. Veronique Ukrinsky. My father is the professor."

"Im Bud Fudlacker. I have a small mail order business. I travel with the American Gladiators. Im 55. I like small appliances, and I do tax accounting on the side."

"[giving orders to kill a mime] And when you shoot him, use the silencer."

"Get out of here. This is a front for Rancor."

"Crazy? Some people think walking down the street muttering to yourself is crazy. Ill tell you what crazy is: Crazy is walking down the street with half a cantaloupe on your head, saying: "Im a hamster. Im a hamster." Thats crazy."

"[To the armless Rancor] Id shake your hand, but I dont remember where it landed."

"Dick, come on. We have to go! NOW!!"

"That Steeles gonna be sorry his mama ever met his papa. We gonna heat up the fire! Boys!!"

"Let me guess: You are Dick Steele. Agent WD-40 and with the Secret Service. You are 52. You like big screen TVs and you wish to stop General Rancor."

"She makes a pretty hood ornament, dont you think? Yes, it is I, good old General Rancor. Im back, big as life and twice as ugly! You did everything except eat me, and Im still alive. All Steele did was blow off a couple of arms. Thats no biggie, no big thing. Now there are plenty of arms!! Big arms!! Pretty aaaarrrms!! I got arms up the wazoo! Now let me show you something. Your pretty little agent is now part of the nose cone on top of my missile. This missile will be launched in 36 hours and nothing will stop me!! Only thing is, Im missing one little chip that controls my satellite, and dag-gone, I want it back! Now you hand me my chip, and Ill give you back your agent. Dick Steele couldnt stop me 15 years ago, and all the Dicks youve got wont stop me now!!"