Humour & Wit Quotes — page 7

Nothing so uncertain as general reputation. A man injures me from humor, passion, or interest; hates me because he has injured me; and speaks ill of me because he hates me.

If the gods have no sense of humour they must weep a great deal.

The well of true wit is truth itself.

An elegant writer has observed, that wit may do very well for a mistress, but that he should prefer reason for a wife.

Censors are dead men set up to judge between life and death. For no live, sunny man would be a censor, he'd just laugh.

I see that Mr. Lloyd George last night confessed that he read the betting news in the papers. (Laughter.) Ah! I shake my head at the Rake's Progress. (Laughter.) ... The only Liberal contribution to the programme advocated by Mr. Lloyd …

There was something so piquant and original in these elucidations of humanity, that Mr. Shelby could not help laughing in company. Perhaps you laugh too, dear reader; but you know humanity comes out in a variety of strange forms …

No longer would we imprison thee though thou art all gentleness and would chat and jest with us by the hour.

You see, Wendy, when the first baby laughed for the first time, its laugh broke into a thousand pieces, and they all went skipping about, and that was the beginning of fairies.

[A]n English wit has well said that affectation displeases us because it has not too much, but too little, art.

Tears are as sweet as laughter to some natures.

The monster London laugh at me.

Thus fair Samela Passeth fair Venus in her bravest hue, And Juno in the show of majesty, For she's Samela; Pallas in wit, all three, if you well view. For beauty, wit, and matchless dignity,

Life is a jest; and all things show it. I thought so once; and now I know it.

A religious symbol does not rest on any opinion. And error belongs only with opinion. One would like to say: This is what took place here; laugh, if you can.

And now to the abyss I pass Of that unfathomable grass, Where men like grasshoppers appear, But grasshoppers are giants there: They, in their squeaking laugh, contemn Us as we walk more low than them:

As we jogg on, either laugh with me, or at me, or in short do any thing—only keep your temper.

Faint winds, and far away a fading laughter... And the rain and over the fields a voice calling...

A lover, when he is admitted to cards, ought to be solemnly silent, and observe the motions of his mistress. He must laugh when she laughs, sigh when she sighs. In short, he should be the shadow of her mind. A lady, in the presence of her …

Laughter, ridicule, opposition, persecution, are often the only reward which Christ's followers get from the world.

Though he made a joke when asked to do the right thing, he always did it. He was so much more in earnest than he appeared. He did not do himself justice.

There are two insults which no human being will endure: The assertion that he hasn't a sense of humor, and the doubly impertinent assertion that he has never known trouble.

A nickname may be the best record of a success. That's what I call putting the face of a joke upon the body of a truth.

For still the world prevail'd, and its dread laugh, Which scarce the firm philosopher can scorn.