Goosebumps (film)

"Lemme tell you something about Steve King: Steve King wishes he could write like me. And Ive sold way more books than him, but nobody ever talks about that! [Zach: Okay.] WAY MORE BOOKS!"

"[in response to being called a dummy] Who are you calling "dummy"... dummy?! [sees Stine reaching for his manuscript] Youre trying to put me BACK IN?!"

"It doesnt work unless its a real Goosebumps story, with twists and turns and frights. Not to mention some personal growth for our hero."

"[driving the Haunted Car] Sorry, folks! Id slow down, but I cant reach the brake!"

"[introduces himself to a classroom] Hello. Ahem. My name is R. L. Stine, and I will be your new English teacher, cause Mr. Boyd is still recuperating from injuries sustained in a mutant insect attack. Now, every story ever told can be broken down into three distinct parts: the beginning, the middle... and the twist."

"[throws a book] That ones a real page-turner. [drives away and laughs]"

"Youve made Slappy very unhappy. Hes not going back on the shelf ever again. [burns the manuscript] I think its time I started pulling the strings in this relationship. Tonight is gonna be the best story youve ever written. All of your children are coming out to play! [laughs]"

"[about reviving Hannah] I may have written one more book."

"[sees a bus] Oh, Papa, theres no escaping from us."

"Hannah: [whispering] Nobody make a sound. [lamp clatters]"

"[being knocked off of Stines car] NOT COOL!"

"You had to pick Abominable Snowman of Pasadena. You couldnt have picked Little Shop of Hamsters."