Bill Mauldin

"My outlook on warfare is best illustrated by a cartoon I did some thirty-odd years ago of a soldier in an Italian foxhole reading about the Normandy invasion and observing to his buddy that: "The hell this aint the most important hole in the world. Im in it."

"I was a born troublemaker and might as well earn a living at it."

"Im convinced that the infantry is the group in the army which gives more and gets less than anybody else."

"Youve got to be a misanthrope in this business, a real son of a bitch. Im touchy. Ive got raw nerve ends, and Ill jump. If I see a stuffed shirt, I want to punch it."

"Willie and Joe are my creatures. Or am I their creature? They are not social reformers. Theyre much more reactive. Theyre not social scientists and Im not a social scientist. Were moral people who do not belong to the moral majority. One of my principles is, Thou shall not bully. The only answer is to muscle the bully. Im very combative that way."

"More than anyone else, save only Ernie Pyle, he caught the trials and travails of the GI. For anyone who wants to know what it was like to be an infantryman in World War II, this book is the place to start — and finish."

"Certainly none of the advances made in civilization has been due to counterrevolutionaries and advocates of the status quo."

"The American public highly overrates its sense of humor. Were great belly laughers and prat fallers, but we never really did have a real sense of humor. Not satire anyway. Were a fatheaded, cotton-picking society. When we realize finally that we arent Gods given children, well understand satire. Humor is really laughing off a hurt, grinning at misery."

"I would like to thank the people who encouraged me to draw army cartoons at a time when the gag mans conception of the army was one of mean ole sergents and jeeps which jump over mountains."

"I havent tried to picture this war in a big, broad-minded way. Im not old enough to understand what its all about, and Im not experienced enough to judge its failures and successes. My reactions are those of a young guy who has been exposed to some of it, and I try to put those reactions in my drawings. Since Im a cartoonist maybe I can be funny after the war, but nobody who has seen this war can be cute about it while its going on. The only way I can try to be a little funny is to make something out of the humorous situations which come up even when you dont think life could be any more miserable."

"Many celebrities and self-appointed authorities have returned from quick tours of war zones (some of them getting within hearing distance of the shooting) and have put out their personal theories to batteries of photographers and reporters. Some say the American soldier is the same clean-cut young man who left his home; others say morale is sky-high at the front because everybodys face is shining for the great Cause. They are wrong. The combat man isnt the same clean-cut lad because you dont fight a kraut by Marquess of Queensberry rules. You shoot him in the back, you blow him apart with mines, you kill or maim him the quickest and most effective way you can with the least danger to yourself. He does the same to you. He tricks you and cheats you, and if you dont beat him at his own game you dont live to appreciate your own nobleness. But you dont become a killer. No normal man who has smelled and associated with death ever wants to see any more of it. In fact, the only men who are even going to want to bloody noses in a fist fight after this war will be those who want people to think they were tough combat men, when they werent. The surest way to become a pacifist is to join the infantry."

"While a guy at home is sweating over his income tax and Victory garden, a dogface somewhere is getting great joy out of wiggling his little finger. He does it just to see it move and to prove to himself that he is still alive and able to move it."