sahraa mein jo milaa thaa mujhe itnaa yaad hai — Nafas Ambalvi

"kaun si shaakh kaa pattaa thaa haraa bhuul gayaa peD se Tuut ke main apnaa pata bhuul gayaa main koi vaa’da-faraamosh nahin huun phir bhi mujh pe ilzaam hai main apnaa kahaa bhuul gayaa apne bachchon ke khilaune to use yaad rahe ghar mein bimaar paDi maan ki davaa bhuul gayaa kar to diin main ne charaaghon ki qataarein raushan hai zamaane ki magar tez havaa bhuul gayaa khauf-e-dozakh se Daraataa rahaa vaa'iz mujh ko aur khud apne gunaahon ki sazaa bhuul gayaa tujh se kuchh kaam thaa lekin tire ghar ke aage ab khaDaa soch rahaa huun ki main kyaa bhuul gayaa be-khudi had se jo guzri to main ik roz 'nafas' ghar se kyaa niklaa ki phir ghar kaa pata bhuul gayaa"

"dar-ba-dar ho ke dar se TuuT gayaa main to jaise safar se TuuT gayaa Dhal gai shaam ab kahaan jaaun jo ta'alluq thaa ghar se TuuT gayaa kuchh khabar bhi hai in havaaon ko zard paTTaa shajar se TuuT gayaa koi had bhi to ho bikharne ki khvaab dekhaa to Dar se TuuT gayaa tum ne naahaq uThaa liye patthar aaina to nazar se TuuT gayaa ahd ye thaa ki saath chalnaa hai phir bashar hi bashar se TuuT gayaa"

"baazi agarche ziist ki ham haar to gae lekin jo dil pe naqsh the aazaar to gae kitne shanaavaron ko ye dariyaa nigal gayaa tughyaaniyon mein duub ke ham paar to gae baarish kaa zor hai mire khasta makaan par lagtaa hai ab ke ye dar-o-divaar to gae ham log ab qadim numaaish ki chiiz hain baazaar se ab apne kharidaar to gae vo darmiyaan ghazal ke jo uTh kar chalaa gayaa ai bazm-e-shaa'iri tire me'yaar to gae lagtaa hai ab ke jaan hi jaaegi ek din is shaa'iri ke shauq mein ghar-baar to gae chal ai 'nafas' ki ham bhi kahin aur jaa basein do-chaar the jo shahr mein gham-khvaar to gae"

"pahle samundaron mein utaaraa gayaa mujhe phir pyaas ki hadon se guzaaraa gayaa mujhe dekhaa to kuchh nahin thaa vahaan dasht ke sivaa phir bhi lagaa ki jaise pukaaraa gayaa mujhe 'umr-e-ravaan ne puchh liyaa mujh se ek din kyon be-dili ke saath guzaaraa gayaa mujhe pahle vo meri maut pe khud mutmain huaa phir daar se zamin pe utaaraa gayaa mujhe baazi ko jitne ki havas mein bisaat par afsos jaan-bujh ke haaraa gayaa mujhe yuun hi main us ki bazm se uTh kar nahin gayaa dar-asl pahle us kaa ishaara gayaa mujhe kuchh main bhi tez-gaam nahin thaa kuchh ai 'nafas' pur-khaar raaston se guzaaraa gayaa mujhe"

"jitne bhi aae zinat-e-baazaar ho gae ik ham hi the jo saahib-e-kirdaar ho gae jhuTon pe tere shahr mein ilzaam tak nahin aur ham ne sach kahaa to gunahgaar ho gae jab bhi kahin charaagh jalaa hai sukut-e-shab sab log aandhiyon ke taraf-daar ho gae vo zaalimon ke saath hain mazlum be-amaan kaise hamaare ahd ke akhbaar ho gae khatre mein hai ab apne qabile ki aabru jo mukhbiron mein the vahi sardaar ho gae Tapkaa lahu 'nafas' ke badan se to yuun huaa qatre jahaan-jahaan gire ash'aar ho gae"

"thakan se tan-badan TuuTaa paDaa hai masaafat ko magar rasta paDaa hai lahu se tar-ba-tar hain paanv lekin hamein har haal mein chalnaa paDaa hai yahaan main tishnagi se jaan-balab huun udhar milon abhi sahraa paDaa hai koi saansein bhalaa kab tak kharide ye saudaa to bahut mahngaa paDaa hai ye raat ab tak nahin suljhi hai mujh se udhar din bhi abhi uljhaa paDaa hai main aakhir ab ise kaise sanbhaalun yahaan to ghar kaa ghar bikhraa paDaa hai bahut bechain saa rahtaa huun din-bhar sunaa hai gaanv mein sukhaa paDaa hai bulaataa hai mujhe aavaaz de kar vo mere ghar kaa jo malba paDaa hai miraa chandaa gayaa pardes jab se ye ghar aangan bahut suunaa paDaa hai bahut bezaar se lagte ho tum bhi asar tum par 'nafas' gahraa paDaa hai"

"vo mujhe zindagi bataataa hai phir bhalaa kyon nazar churaataa hai main usi ko uThaa rahaa thaa par vo mujhe hi faqat giraataa hai yaad us ko kiyaa yahaan main ne par mujhe vo vahaan bhulaataa hai raaz saare bataa diye main ne kyon magar raaz vo chhupaataa hai log masruf hain mohabbat mein aur vo dil miraa dukhaataa hai"

"dil shaad nahin karte aabaad nahin karte mahsus ye hotaa hai vo yaad nahin karte naashaad zamaane ke dil shaad nahin karte kam-aql parindon ko aazaad nahin karte mohtaaj-e-karam aksar rahte hain gharibon ke jo log gharibon ki imdaad nahin karte kuchh log shikaayat ko haq apnaa samajhte hain kuchh log kabhi tum se fariyaad nahin karte ham apne iraadon mein rakhte hain tavaanaai ham daad ke taalib ko bedaad nahin karte jo aap ki niyyat kaa kuchh ilm hamein hotaa ham apni mohabbat ko barbaad nahin karte is daur-e-siyaasat mein 'mahmud' qayaamat hai ahbaab jo karte hain jallaad nahin karte"

"kahe detaa huun go hai to nahin ye baat kahne ki tiri khvaahish nahin dil mein ziyaada der rahne ki bachaa kar dil guzartaa jaa rahaa huun har ta’alluq se kahaan us aable ko taab hai ab choT sahne ki rag-o-pai mein na hangaama kare to kyaa kare aakhir ijaazat jab nahin is ranj ko aankhon se bahne ki bas apni apni tarjihaat apni apni khvaahish hai tujhe shohrat kamaane ki mujhe ik she'r kahne ki jahaan kaa huun vahin ki raas aaegi fazaa mujh ko ye duniyaa bhi bhalaa koi jagah hai mere rahne ki jo kal 'irfaan' par guzri sunaa kuchh us ke baare mein khabar tum ne suni tufaan mein dariyaa ke bahne ki"

"kal shab dil-e-aavaara ko siine se nikaalaa ye aakhiri kaafir bhi madine se nikaalaa ye fauj nikalti thi kahaan khaana-e-dil se yaadon ko nihaayat hi qarine se nikaalaa main khuun bahaa kar bhi huaa baagh mein rusvaa us gul ne magar kaam pasine se nikaalaa Thahre hain zar-o-sim ke haqdaar tamaashaai aur maar-e-siyah ham ne dafine se nikaalaa ye soch ke saahil pe safar khatm na ho jaae baahar na kabhi paanv safine se nikaalaa"

"Tuut kar ab sanvar gayaa huun main is tarah se bikhar gayaa huun main jo tire naam ki gali hai vo us gali se guzar gayaa huun main yaadein teri sameT laayaa huun aaj jab se udhar gayaa huun main khud mukarnaa sikhaa diyaa us ne phir kahaa ki mukar gayaa huun main kal talak jo na kar sakaa thaa main aaj vo kaam kar gayaa huun main yuun kahin main nahin Thahartaa par tere dar par Thahar gayaa huun main"

"bistar-e-karb pe jab niind jalaai main ne tab kisi khvaab ki buniyaad uThaai main ne zakhm aise the ki har shakhs ke aage rakkhe baat aisi thi ki khud se bhi chhupaai main ne hurmat-e-gham ke liye khud ko aziyyat bakhshi phir usi dard se taskin bhi paai main ne main ne zakhmon ko kuredaa unhein taaza rakkhaa tab kahin dasht mein ki naghma-saraai main ne apni khiDki se yunhi khud ko pukaaraa kal shab aur phir khud ko vo aavaaz sunaai main ne jaane vaale se rag-e-jaan kaa bhi rishta thaa 'samir' ye samajhne mein bahut der lagaai main ne"